I’d like to share with you a perspective on retirement.
Entering retirement is like entering you late teens – without the acne.
What do the two time periods of our lives have in common?
Uncertainty, vulnerability, changing identity.
Uncertainty in the years to come
When we are in our late teens there are big unknowns:
- Am I going on to college, which college?
- What will the course of study be?
- Will I marry? Who will I marry?
- What kind of job will I find?
Entering retirement also has very big questions with answers that are just as uncertain.
- Will my money last?
- Will I be able to stay in my home?
- Will I stay healthy and able?
Vulnerability
As teenagers and as retirees—we may feel that we are at the mercy of our emotions
Our reactions may be out of proportion to whatever event triggered them. Suddenly we experience surging emotions –passion, depression, anger, or fear.
Sometimes we feel out of control not sure what is pushing our buttons.
In both time frames, we may feel we don’t have much control, or power to shape our lives?
Changing identity
The teenager is finding a voice, maturing, trying to fit in, be liked and be taken seriously.
The retiree may be asked: “What do you do for work?”
Perhaps the retiree happily answers, “I’m retired.”
OR maybe the person says, “ I used to be…. such and such.” The title at work gave the person an identity and gave structure to the day. The retiree is not ready to completely remove that identity and is trying to figure out what to do with the hours of the day, and asks:
- Who am I if I am not that person who did such and such a job?
- What do I do all day?
- Well, the volunteering, gave me something to do. It whiled away the hours.
- I wish there was something I could do that is worthwhile.<>/li
Are the sentiments above going to express your view when you have time on your hands?
As you head to retirement, why not have a discussion with yourself, or others about these ideas:
Uncertainty– What does your future look like?
When you were 18 what did you guess or think would unfold in the next five years?
Did what you expected to happen, actually happen?
Now that you are retired – what do you expect or guess might happen in the next five years?
Vulnerability
Who are you emotionally?
When you were 18 what were you passionate about?
what got you angry?
What did you fear?
At your current stage of life, what are you passionate about? what makes you angry? What do you fear?
What is the same emotionally? What’s different?
What do you feel in control of?
Identity
Who are you?
What is your gift to others now?
For what talents, or actions do you want to be remembered?
Try out this comparison of you as a teenager and you now and see what it leads you to. You might rediscover deep interests that you set aside for years, because of the pressures of making a living.
You may find more to treasure in your life, more to live for, and more vitality.
May your retirement be a lively one with the energy of a youth and the wisdom of age.